Really

My dad used to drink, and with that and the hd he was not himself. He got mad. I guess thats why im not comfortable with people drinking. I don't want them to change.

Daddy was gone to the bar and mom had to go with my uncle somewhere. She wouldnt tell us the truth because it was too scary. Daddy had collapsed and he stopped breathing and needed cpr. The alcohol mixed with the medications. He almost died.

I love that my mom is happy with someone shes in love with. I just miss my daddy so much that i don't know i could handle to go to their wedding. I can't watch them touch each other. I just feel like it would hurt my dad so bad. He was often afraid of her being around other guys from the hd. Her sneaking out and seeing them even though she wasn't. When i can't handle things i turn it over to god and jesus. I can't worry about the future it hurts too much, lord my one and only god, please im resting with faith this worry, and knowing its going to turn out how its meant to be. No worries, just always keep faith. It's so hard but so important. It hurts so much worse when i know what they're doing. It's too soon for me, its too soon, its too soon. I want my family back.